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I Did It All For You – secret recording captures Key’s flag referendum heartbreak
March 2016
By Simon Prast
Saddy McSadface - aka John Key

Breaking News: New Zealand Prime Minister John Key's real feelings about losing that country's recent flag referendum have been inadvertently captured on tape by a local freelance cameraman.

Moments before Thursday night's press conference, the cameraman accidentally dropped a camera bag containing a tape recorder outside the briefing room. The device then recorded Key's remarks immediately prior to his entrance to give a rehearsed concession speech.

"The real losers here are the people of New Zealand." Key is heard to say.

"I'm getting on a private jet to Washington, so what do I care? I've got places to go and people to see. And you want to talk about legacy? I've got over $50 million in the bank and a knighthood in the bag, so I mean, really, at the end of the day, you tell me who the losers are? If those rent-a-referendum wankers don't want a new flag, that's fine by me, they can just fuck right off back to the Palmerston North RSA or wherever. I mean, good luck with that! Losers! Fuck them! Fuck them all, actually."

The tape then goes on to record a telephone conversation, apparently with ex-All Black captain Richie McCaw. An audibly emotional Key thanks McCaw for his support but then completely breaks down.

"Richie, I know we lost and I know you and me have always been about winning but I love you, Richie, I've always loved you. I did it all for you." Key is heard to sob before the tape ends.

– Dissociated Press.

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