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Kapiti gets alphbetical health warning
April 2016
Will the favoured alphabetical listing cause a raft of name changes for candidates wanting to top the list.

Kapiti Coast District Council have recently decided to continue with the practice of listing candidates alphabetically on voting papers rather than following most other councils who have decided it was fairer to have candidates listed in random order. The Ministry of Justice figures support the view that alphabetical listing favours those with surnames early in the alphabet. Not surprisingly those who voted for the alphabetical listing included Cr Ammundsen, Bell, Cardiff, Church, and Gaylor.


We have had the following satirical piece submitted which gives more details of where this might lead.


Kapiti Ratepayers have been warned about the Cognitive function disease sweeping the district, Alphabetotbia.

Mayor 'Ross Church' has announced with immediate effect that all meeting agendas will be alphabetized

"Council Staff & Councilors have noted the confusion caused to the residents of Kapiti by the presentation of items not presented in alphabetical order" , stating "We had previously just thought they were all 'THICK', but now the results are in from the 12 year $800,000 Ratepayer funded survey, & we have discovered the problem."

"Along with advice from our very expensive lawyers, Mid central Health, The Electoral Commission & the Better Drugs For Better Decision Making Co-operative (who we consult prior to all meetings, obviously), we have therefore decided for the benefit of the whole district that it is better to give up Democracy rather than
put our Ratepayers at further risk of the spread of this unfortunate ailment.
Please Note , that these decisions have been made for the good of the district, by us as we know best & as we are not accountable for our actions no further correspondence will be entered into!!!"

"Council Staff will be manning a 24hr Helpline and Helpful hints are posted on our website, including suggestions like, When going shopping make your list out in alphabetical order to save on Stress & Confusion" & "ensure you visit
Countdown first, followed by New world then Pack n save"

"Our hope is that one day we can overcome this Pandemic & Kapiti Coast Phenomena, so we are planning an advertising campaign to try and attract intelligent people to the Coast, but this is unlikely to have any effect until the current A, B , C Cartel is broken."

 
Comments
Bozzy Boots (added 19 weeks ago)
Aaaaargggghhhh!!!
Abbie Abacus (added 55 weeks ago)
Just for the record, I would like to ensure all the public know the Mayor Ross Church said...We wouldnt want to confuse Kapiti voters by not having the names in alphabetical order just where they expect to find them, they might make the wrong votes if we confuse them. I will let you ponder for a while on that statement and the complete and utter disrespect for Kapiti residents and ratepayers behind it.
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KC News: the Internet Newspaper for the Kapiti Coast